The Guide to the Unexplained
by TenshiWarrior
Summary: The Pines try go deeper into the mystery of secrets of Gravity Falls. Follow them as they uncover new things, or at least try to. (Spin off of Adventures of the Pines)
1. File 1: Stan's Tattoo

**_Summary:_**

 _In this file of the Guide to the Unexplained, the triplets try to find out why their Grunkle Stan is hiding a tattoo that he claims doesn't exist._

* * *

 _Okay is everything ready? Everyone ready?_

 _You sure we should be doing this?_

 _Of course, people need to know about what we find, so we need to document._

 _I'm all for it!_

 _Me too!_

 _Of course you both are._

 _Alright, let's do this, in 3… 2… 1._

* * *

Mabel had turned on a camera with a press of a button, and was seen squishing Dipper's head. Mira and Gary stood beside Dipper, just as they were finished fixing up there clothing and hair. Dipper cleared his throat and began to speak, "Hello, my name is Dipper Pines. The girl trying to crush my head right now is my sister Mabel."

"I'm helpful!" Mabel said as she waved her hand in front of the camera.

"And the two standing beside me is my first cousin twice removed, Gary and my other sister Miracle, also known as Mira." He introduced, pointing to Gary and Mira.

"Hi there!" Gary said with a smile.

"Hello…" Mira said shyly.

"This is our first time doing this, but we came to a vote that the guide to the unexplained should be documented for all to see if anyone happens to stumble across this." Dipper explained, "So today on the Guide to the Unexplained, we're gonna be-"

He was cut off when Mabel continued to squish his head; he quickly waved it off, "Mabel stop. We're trying to film here. Anyway, today on the Guide to the Unexplained we're going to be looking at Anomaly 23…"

Gary held up a cardboard sign to the camera which was a makeshift title card it had read-

" _ **STAN'S TATTOO**_ "

"Mira if you please." Dipper said.

"Oh it's my turn now?" Mira said, before clearing her throat. The camera panned over to a cardboard wall with several pictures of Stan. Mostly the shots were showing his back; on the back of his right shoulder there is what appears to be of a tattoo that is covered by his white undershirt.

"We've noticed for awhile now that Grunkle Stan has taken the trouble of hiding this tattoo from everyone in the Mystery Shack. What could it be exactly? A college prank? A secret symbol? Or maybe something even more." Mira explained, "But every time we ask, Stan just denies all claims that the tattoo exists. We even asked our cousin Skyla, but she denies this as well. We have a sneaking suspicion that she's the only one who knows what it is exactly, but like I said, she just pretends it's not there, like Grunkle Stan does."

"But today's the day we find out what it is, and where it came from." Dipper said to the camera.

"Right after an exciting episode of…" Mabel said before pointing the camera over to her knee which had a band-aid, "What's under Mabel's Bandage?"

Mabel began to peel it off while she sang.

" **EW MABEL!** " Dipper exclaimed.

" **MABEL NO!** " Mira yelled.

" **QUICK TURN IT OFF!** " Gary shouted before there was static.

* * *

The camera had turned on again after a brief moment of static. Dipper, and Mira stood beside a thermostat, along with Gary and Soos. "Like all plans, we're going to begin with Plan A." Dipper said, "Stan, never ever takes his undershirt off."

"Obviously to hide his tattoo." Gary whispered loudly.

"But we're about to… _**Turn up the heat**_ on this mystery." Mira said with a wink of an eye. Dipper went and turned the knob, turning the heat up.

"Haha! Literally!" Soos said, "I love how you come up with stuff like that."

After Gary hid the camera where Stan wouldn't see it, Soos had gotten into position as he saw Stan sorting out some inventory in the shop. Soos wiped the sweat off of his forehead, "Sure is hot in here, huh Mr. Pines?" Soos said, "Probably be a lot cooler in here if we… Worked without our shirts on!" Soos removed his shirt causing Stan's eyes to widen at this.

"Am I right?" He said.

"Soos, I will _**pay**_ you to put your shirt back on." Stan said.

"Aw don't be shy Mr. Pines." Soos said, before climbing up on the table, laying down on his side, "Bodies are nothing to be ashamed of."

"Watch the store for a few minutes." Stan said, "I need to go find a melon baller to pull my eyeballs out."

With that Stan left the store; Leaving Soos with nothing else to do, he started to play with his stomach while he sang.

" _Do-do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do, hey! Da-da-da-da-da-"_

* * *

Once again there was a brief moment of static before it was turned back on again. Mira was holding the camera while Dipper lead her into the living room.

"Okay, so obviously, plan A didn't work out so well." Dipper said, "So we're moving on to Plan B." Mira stood at a close distance while Dipper approached their Grunkle Stan who sat on the lounge chair watching TV with a Pit Cola in his hand.

"Heavens." Dipper said, "Is that poison oak on your shoulder? Here, let me scratch it for you."

Dipper reached out to his right shoulder, only to have his hand smacked away.

"Kid, if you're trying to see my tattoo you're gonna have to try harder than that." Stan said.

" **HA!** " Mira exclaimed, "You said you didn't have a tattoo!"

"I don't." Stan said, before taking out a red marker, "But you're brother does."

Dipper was confused at this, "Wait what do you mean by- **AAAHH!** "

* * *

Dipper, Gary, Mira and Mabel were standing just outside of the bathroom; On Dipper's forehead he had the word " _ **GOOBER**_ " written with the red marker; In the bathroom, the sound of running water was heard.

"Unfortunately we're moving on to Plan C." Mira said, "Stan is currently in the bathroom, taking a shower."

"Trust me when I say, we didn't want to have to come to this." Dipper said, "But sometimes you have to do terrible things for science."

"I believe in you Goober." Mabel said who was holding the camera.

"Dipper. Just call him Dipper." Mira said.

Dipper took the camera and they all proceeded to the bathroom. "Okay, be prepared to be scarred for life." Gary said before opening the door. They entered the bathroom and approached the shower curtain.

"Ready?" Gary whispered taking hold of the shower curtain.

"Ready." Dipper and Mira whispered back.

Gary pulled back the curtain, and they were met with the steam of the water. When the steam cleared, they were pretty much shocked to find that Stan was standing there fully clothed, and water running down his face and suit.

"You're never gonna see it kid." He said, " _ **NEVER. GONNA. SEE IT.**_ "

"Were you just standing there the whole time?" Mira asked him.

Stan shouted while lunging at them, " **GIVE ME THAT CAMERA!** "

The three children screamed and quickly ran out of the bathroom, Dipper nearly dropping the camera. They had managed to get ahead when Stan had slipped on the wood floor, almost falling on his face.

* * *

The camera once again turned on, and the three children were sitting on top of the roof of the Mystery Shack.

"Hi, us again!" Dipper said, "If you're wondering why we're on the roof, I'd just figure we would just hang out here for a bit, right guys?"

"Yup." Mira and Gary said in unison. Though it wasn't till they heard their Grunkle Stan shout as crows flew out of the trees, " **I'M GONNA FIND YOU KIDS!** "

"How long do you guys think he'll give up?" Gary asked Dipper and Mira.

"Probably not for awhile." Dipper replied.

Mira had then said awkwardly, "Than… I guess this is the end of the episode?"

Dipper shrugged at this, "Yeah, I guess so." He turned his attention to the camera, "Stan's tattoo remains a mystery, but who knows what other kinds of secrets are waiting to be uncovered."


	2. File 2: The Man Who Always Stands Left

_We got everything ready?_

 _Yup, plans and theories are all set up._

 _This is so exciting!_

 _Alright, start recording._

* * *

The camera turned on, and it showed, Dipper, Mira and Mabel in the town of Gravity Falls. Mira was holding the camera, pointing to her brother and sister. "You sure this is on?" Dipper asked, tapping lightly on the camera.

"Yeah, the red light means it's going." Mira replied.

"Okay good." He said before clearing his throat, and his eyes looked into the camera, "Hello, and welcome back to the Guide to the Unexplained. Today, my sisters and I investigate the next anomaly of this town."

Dipper and Mabel held up the title card made of cardboard which had read "Anomaly 82…"

" _ **Lefty**_ "

"You're probably wondering what we mean by the title card Lefty." Mira said turning the camera towards her, "Well, we're talking about this guy." Mira turned the camera over to a man the was facing left.

"Sure he may look normal." Dipper said, "But if he's so normal… Explain why he's always facing left. Literally, my sisters and I have been following this guy everywhere, and not once have we seen his right side, and neither has anybody else. Mabel, Mira, you're theories?"

Dipper took the camera from Mira and pointed the camera towards her and Mabel.

Mabel held up an envelope that had read, "Top Secret"

"Theory #1!" Mabel said taking the picture from an envelope, "He's hiding an embarrassing sunburn!"

"Theory 2." Mira said, taking a picture from the envelope, "He was in a war, and has a horrible scar."

Mabel took out a third picture, "Theory #3: Half-man, half-lizard man!"

Mira removed a fourth picture, "Theory 4: He's a beast that's cursed."

"And theory 5, my personal favorite." Mabel said with a smile, before removing the final picture, "He's normal! And Dipper's just crazy!"

Dipper had basically smacked the picture out of her hand, "That's not a theory!" Dipper said, "Ignore that last one!"

Mabel couldn't help but laugh at Dipper's reaction.

"Today's the day we're going to find out!" Mira said. They had soon ran into the bowling alley just across the street, and opened the front door, finding the man that was always facing left. "Hello! Good afternoon sir!" Mira greeted.

"I'm sorry, camera's aren't allowed in here." The man said to them.

"Uh, it's not on." Dipper said pretending to turn off the camera.

"He bought it." Mabel whispered.

She stood next to the camera while, Dipper and Mira stood at the counter. "So… If it's not too much trouble, can you grab those bowling shoes for me?" Mira asked, "On your… _**Right side**_?"

The man pointed to the ones on the right, "Those ones?"

Mira nodded her head. The man went ahead to get them, but didn't turn to his right side as he picked up the bowling shoes and placed them on the counter. "There you are ma'am." He said.

"Thanks." Mira replied looking at Dipper. He winked his eye, and took out of wallet from his pocket. Dipper purposely threw his wallet over the counter and on the man's right side. "Whoops!" Dipper said, "I dropped my wallet. It's over there. Your right side. Could you maybe turn around and…"

The man sighed and went to pick up Dipper's wallet, still not turning around as he did. He handed his wallet back to Dipper, and he took it from him. "There you are sir." He said as he did this.

Dipper sighed, "Fine… could you just get our ball for us?"

"I don't see why not." He said as he left the counter. With the man distracted, Dipper motioned Mira to grab the camera, and Mira went with a quick pace. They walked over to the man as he asked about their bowling ball.

"Let's see, looks like maybe it's in here…" The man said.

"I was thinking it could be a- **NOW!** " He said shouting to his siblings. Mira and Mabel had forced him to turn around and they were in for a shock.

"What the-!?"

"Oh my-!"

"Holy cupcakes!"

There before them they saw that on the right side of the man was all robotic and tiny little aliens were controlling him. They mumbled a few words to one another before noticing the triplets standing there completely in shock by what they were seeing.

"Guys!" One of the little aliens shouted getting the others attention.

The triplets gasped when they saw the little aliens look at them.

" **WE'RE BLOWN! SHUT IT DOWN!** " Another little alien shouted before taking out a cube, " **SHUT IT ALL DOWN!** "

Each of the aliens had swallowed the cubes and dropped to the ground before exploding.

" **THE TIME HAS COME!** "

" **THE TIME HAS COME!** "

" **THE TIME HAS COME BROTHER!** "

"I can't! I have a family!"

" **YOU SIGNED THE OATH!** "

Once all the little aliens were gone, the robot dismantled itself before bursting into flames, turning to ash. The sprinkles turned on and everyone in the bowling alley and started to explain. The triplets on the other hand quickly ran to the exit of the bowling alley.

"Well, that concludes another episode to anomaly #82!" Dipper said to the camera.

"Guys!" Mira said, "I think we should burn this tape!"

And just like that there was static.


	3. File 3: The Mailbox

_**Alright, everything's all set up? You got that letter?**_

 _ **Yup!**_

 _ **As ready as I'll ever be I guess.**_

 _ **I got it dude.**_

 _ **Here we go… 3, 2, 1.**_

The camera turned on and it was revealed to be Dipper holding the camera. "Hello, and welcome back to the Guide to the Unexplained." He said to the camera, "Today we're gonna be looking at anomaly #54…"

Dipper picked up the cardboard cover which had read…

" _ **The Mailbox**_ "

Dipper turned the camera over to a single old rusted mailbox that stood alone in the middle of the forest.

"There it is. Just sitting there in the middle of the forest." Dipper said, "There's no house nearby, not even an address on the mailbox. Today, myself and team of experts…"

Both Soos, Andrew and Gary walked into the view of the camera.

"Hello audience!" Gary greeted with a smile.

"Hi there, I'm new." Andrew waved.

"Sup dude?" Soos said to the camera.

"... Are gonna put a letter in and see who picks it up." Dipper finished.

"Soos' letter, posits a simple, salient question." Andrew said. Soos showed the letter to the camera. " _Sup dawg_?" Soos read. Gary went and opened the mailbox and Soos had placed the letter inside; Gary closed the mailbox shut.

Dipper said, "Okay, now we're gonna go hide behind a bush and wait for someone to-What!?"

"Oh dude!"

"Holy Moses!"

"Hot belgian waffles!"

The mailbox began to shake violently and suddenly the flag stood upright; when it had done that, the mailbox had stopped shaking. "Did you see that!?" Soos said to them.

"Yeah, of course we saw it!" Andrew said.

"Dipper, please tell me you got that on camera?" Gary asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I did." He replied.

Dipper placed the camera down and went to join the group, eyeing the mailbox. "Open it!" Dipper said to them. "Are you crazy, I'm not opening that!" Andrew said.

"You open it!" Soos suggested to Dipper, "I'm not touching a haunted mailbox!"

"Go on Dipper, I dare you." Gary said.

Dipper gulped and opened the mailbox; he reached inside as he squeezed his eyes shut. But what he pulled out of the mailbox was… A different letter?

"What?" Dipper said looking at it, seeing as how the paper was different from the one they had put in the mailbox earlier.

"That wasn't there before." Gary said.

"But how can that be?" Andrew asked with confusion. Dipper opened the letter and they were all shocked to see what it had read. Soos showed it to the camera. " _ **Hello, Dipper, Soos, Andrew and Gary**_." He read.

"It knows our names!" Dipper said with awe.

"That's insane!" Gary said astonished.

"I can't believe it!" Andrew said with awe as well.

Soos had asked them, "What if this thing is all knowing?"

The three of them looked to Soos, having the same question on their mind as well.

"We gotta test it." Dipper said to the group.

* * *

The camera turned on and it showed the group once again in front of the mailbox; Andrew and Soos stood there with two more letters. "Okay, so Soos and I wrote two questions for the mailbox to answer. One is simple, one is difficult." Andrew explained before showing the first letter.

" _What is my mother's first name_?" Andrew read before he gave a brief explanation, "Skyla is my mom's middle name, but no one in the town knows this since she doesn't like being called by her first name for a reason unknown; my brother and I know her first name, but I think Stan might know why she likes to be called by her middle name though I don't think I wanna ask. With that being said…"

Andrew placed the letter in the mailbox and closed it shut. Just like before the mailbox shook and the flag stood upright; the shaking had stopped. Andrew opened the mailbox taking out the letter from the mailbox.

" _ **Alexandria**_." Andrew had read, "Huh, it was dead on."

"Alexandria doesn't sound like a bad name." Dipper said.

"I know right, it's weird." Gary said, "Anyway… Soos, the next question."

Soos showed the letter to the camera, " _What did I shave my hair into this morning?_ " He read.

"This should be interesting, I mean, Soos didn't even tell us this." Dipper said.

He put the flag down and placed the letter inside shutting it. The mailbox shook again, and the flag stood up. Soos opened the mailbox and read the letter aloud, " _ **A baby duck holding a paddleball**_." Soos gasped at this, "Dude! It knew!"

Soos removed his head and showed the back of his head to the group. They gasped when they saw that the mailbox was spot on.

"What!?"

"Holy Moses!"

"O...M...G! That is so cool!"

Soos hatched an idea, "Let's ask it more questions!"

* * *

- _ **Day 1: Dipper's Question**_ -

Dipper wrote down his question for the day. " _When does the world end?_ " Dipper wrote before placing it into the box. After a brief moment, he got his answer.

" _ **3012**_." Dipper read, "Huh, we got a while."

* * *

- _ **Day 2: Soos Question**_ -

Soos had written down his question for the day.

" _Who is my dream woman?_ " Soos read. He placed the letter in the mailbox and had gotten his answer. He had a picture of a muscular woman. "Ho! Ho! Ho! Hot tamales!" Soos said, "I'm saving this one for the archives!" With that Soos had placed the picture into his pocket.

* * *

- _ **Day 3: Gary's Question**_ -

Gary showed his question of the day.

" _Any chance I can ever be a movie celebrity?_ " He read.

After placing the letter in the mailbox _,_ Gary had gotten his answer.

" _ **No, but there is a chance you can be famous photographer like your grandmother**_." Gary read, "Welp, can't argue with that!"

* * *

- _ **Day 4: Andrew's Question**_ -

" _Will I ever find true love?_ " Andrew read, before placing it into the mailbox.

He had soon gotten his answer.

" _ **I see a certain ginger in your future.**_ " Andrew read. He turned slightly red at this.

"It's not talking about who I think it's talking about is it?" Andrew said tugging on the collar of his shirt.

* * *

Dipper was next to go again on asking the mailbox, but he was struggling to think of what to ask. Soos, Gary, and Andrew were throwing him suggestions.

"Um… Let's see…" Dipper thought, "What is the exact time and date of my death?"

"Did aliens build the pyramids!?" Soos suggested.

"Will there be smell-o-vision?!" Gary said

"What is the meaning of life!?" Andrew had also suggested.

"What are marshmallows made of!?" Soos suggested a second time.

"Who wrote journal 3!?" Dipper said.

The whole group seemed to have agreed to that. "Yes do it! Ask who wrote the journal!" They practically said.

Dipper had gotten excited at this, "This is it! We're finally gonna get the mysteries to Gravity Falls!"

Just than Mabel had gotten into the view of the camera. "Nifty! A mailbox!" She said, "I've been wanting to mail mom this video of me, sticking 100 gummy worms up my nose!"

" **NO!** " They exclaimed. Though it was too late, Mabel had placed the package inside the mailbox and it shook before the flag stood upright. Dipper took out the letter and read it, " _ **Your gummy worm video has disturbed and insulted me. You fools are unworthy of my great knowledge. The era of human enlightenment shall never come to pass.**_ "

The mailbox had started to glow and the ground shook.

"What the-!?" Soos said.

" **RUN! QUICK!** " Andrew shouted.

Everyone quickly ran from the mailbox just as it imploded, the whole screen turned to static.

* * *

When the camera came on again, the whole group was covered in ash and soot and they're hair looked a bit messed up after the mailbox had just exploded.

"Well…" Dipper said before coughing, "That concludes this episode of the Guide to the Unexplained. Where we learned when dealing with the unknown… **DO NOT MAIL VIDEOS OF YOURSELF SHOVING GUMMY WORMS UP YOUR NOSE!** "

Mabel smiled and said while pulling out a bag of gummy worms, "There's plenty more where that came from!"

Mabel started to put them up her nose while she sang; Dipper quickly ran to the camera.

" **SHOW'S OVER! TURN OFF THE CAMERA-!** "

* * *

 _ **BONUS (Day ? Mira's Question**_ **)**

Late at night, Mira had gone into the forest since she heard from Dipper that they found a mailbox that knows everything. She found the mailbox in the middle of forest like Dipper said. She looked around and sighed with relief when she found that no one was there. She placed the flashlight nearby and turned on the camera.

"This is Miracle Pines. Mira for short." Mira said, "No one knows that I'm out here, not even my brother or sister. I've been wanting to know this for a while now, and it's killing me just thinking about it. When I heard from Dipper that this mailbox knows everything, I knew it could tell me. I just need one question answered than I'll go back to the shack for the night."

She showed the camera what her question was, " _The man I keep seeing in my dreams, who is he?_ " Mira had read.

Mira approached the mailbox and placed the letter inside, closing it shut. She jumped when she saw the mailbox begin to shake and the flag stood upright. She opened the mailbox and saw that there was a different letter inside.

Mira opened the letter and gasped when she saw the answer. She looked to the camera than to the letter putting a hand over her mouth when she read the answer that had only a single word on it. She folded up the letter and put it in her pocket, before going to turn off the camera.


End file.
